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Negotiating Success. Tips and Tools for Building Rapport and Dissolving Conflict While Still Getting What You Want

  • ID: 2638566
  • Book
  • 272 Pages
  • John Wiley and Sons Ltd
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Praise for Negotiating Success

"Negotiating Success is an inspiring book that skillfully integrates the hard and soft skills needed to ensure win–win outcomes in negotiations. The reader will raise his/her emotional intelligence, learn new concepts based on the latest brain research, understand the principles of ethical influence, and gain the skills and steps necessary for intelligent negotiations. Hard skills with soft edges that′s the winning formula!"
Lance H. K. Secretan, PhD, bestselling author of The Spark, the Flame, and the Torch

"In a world rife with conflict, it is refreshing to find a book intent on dissolving it. Negotiate in a way that allows both sides to win? That′s exactly when magic happens, believes Jim Hornickel, who reveals the benefits of mutuality–based negotiations. In this must–read book, Hornickel offers step–by–step instructions on how to infuse the negotiations process with win–win attitudes and actions. He provides questions to ponder, specific examples, and skill–building exercises."
Lorri Freifeld, Editor–in–Chief, Training magazine

"Who knew that the elements of smart and effective negotiating could be so fascinating? Jim Hornickel opens a window into a process that we engage in many times every day, both formally and informally. Through the use of real life scenarios, he offers many useful insights into ways to make our daily transactions more fruitful for all concerned."
Barry Bouthilette, author, Feel the Zest: 89 Ways to Be Fully Energized

"Jim Hornickel′s book is a groundbreaking, fascinating read. Hornickel takes head on the many challenges of negotiating and created a comprehensive pathway to making them a success. Drawing from his own experience, Hornickel provides insights into the psychology and spiritual/mindfulness principles and digs deep into what it really takes to prepare for and execute a successful negotiation. I highly recommend this book. Read it from cover to cover and you will have the tools needed to master successful negotiations. It is an instructive read for our professional and personal lives."
Larry Hunt, HR Director, Smith College

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Introduction xi


1 Valuing Mutuality, Proactivity, and R.E.S.P.E.C.T. 3

Mutuality 3

Proactivity 6

R.E.S.P.E.C.T 7

Mutuality, Proactivity, and R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Summary 19

2 Reviewing Human Fundamentals 23

False Self and True Self 26

Centricities 31

Reviewing Human Fundamentals Summary 33

3 Expanding Emotional Intelligence 35

Self–Awareness 37

Self–Management 44

Social Awareness 46

Managing Relationships 50

Expanding Emotional Intelligence Summary 51

Case Study 52

4 Working with Negotiating Styles 54

Doer Task–Oriented 61

Thinker Task–Oriented 63

Talker People–Oriented 65

Guardian People–Oriented 67

Working with Negotiating Styles Summary 69

Unfolding Case Study 69

5 Integrating Six Principles of Ethical Influence 72

The Principle of Reciprocity 73

The Principle of Liking 77

The Principle of Social Proof 80

The Principle of Authority 81

The Principle of Consistency 84

The Principle of Scarcity 86

Integrating the Six Principles of Influence Summary 88

6 Dissolving Conflict 90

Code of Conduct 91

Conflict Escalation 95

Conflict De–Escalation 95

Dissolving Conflict Summary 96

7 Presenting Your Case 98

Why People Buy 99

Image, Productivity, and/or Profitability 100

Numb Pain Ready to Act 102

Reception Challenges 104

Doer as Presenter 106

Thinker as Presenter 109

Talker as Presenter 112

Guardian as Presenter 114

Summary of Behavior Styles as Presenters 116

Setting Direction 4 A s 117

Summary of Behavioral Styles 4 A s Satisfaction Points 123

Using Your Voice The 6 P s 123

Competence and Confidence 130

Composed Beginning 130

Strong Stride 130

Leader s Stance 131

Breathe 132

Eye Connection 132

Expressive Face 133

Body Language and Gestures 134

Presenting Your Case Summary 135


8 Understanding Negotiation Fundamentals 139

Negotiation Fundamentals 139

Assumptions 139

Information Is Power 142

Disclosure Establishes Trust 143

Overly Competitive = Lose–Lose 144

Trading Value Concessions 145

Creative Thinking 148

Understanding Negotiation Fundamentals Summary 153

9 Creating Range and Alternatives 155

Wish 156

Starting Point 157

Who Names the Number First? 158

Bottom Line 159

BATNA Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement 160

WATNA Worst Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement 161

Creating Range and Alternatives Summary 162

10 Concretizing Why, What, and How 163

Why, What, and How 163

Concretizing Why, What, and How Summary 168

11 Preparing for Your Session 170

Uniting Your Team 177

Preparing for Your Session Summary 179

12 Discovering All Sides 181

Discovery Phase 181

Skills for Use in Discovery 185

Discovery Phase Summary 203

13 Checking In Before Moving On 205

Check–in Phase 205

Check In Before Moving On Summary 207

14 Trading for Mutual Gain 209

Trade Phase 209

Trading for Mutual Gain Summary 215

15 Evaluating for Improvement 217

Evaluate Phase 217

Evaluating for Improvement Summary 219

16 Disposing of Tactics 221

Exposing Tactics 221

The Use of Tactics 222

Disposing of Tactics Summary 240

17 Practicing for Life 242

Appendix 243

Index 249

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Jim Hornickel
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